Fear and Worry

The last week I have been filled with so many emotions. It started when I heard the tragic news last week of Steven Curtis Chapman's 5-year-old daughter being killed in their driveway. A couple of days later a friend told me her cousin's family was dealing with the exact same situation where his 5-year-old son had been killed in the driveway. That night Chris and I watched a mediocre movie called Bella, about a soccer star who hits and kills a young girl in a tragic accident. (I had no idea the movie was about that or I never would have watched it!) When we were watching the movie I was so affected that I physically thought I was going to be sick. I had to excuse myself and just have a good cry in the bathroom. After the movie, I cried my eyes out again and told Chris I am just sick thinking "what if that was me?" I love my children more than I can even begin to express, and losing one of them would make me feel like life itself had ended. I think I would end up in a looney bin--it seems like that pain would be so great I could never recover.

The next morning I came to the Lord begging Him to give me some comfort and wisdom. I searched His Word for verses to speak to my fear and worrying, and I found Matthew 6:27, "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" I realized that all this worry over what MIGHT happen is futile. My devotional magazine, Journey, put it well when the author wrote, "It's normal and good to fear a poisonous snake or lightning when we're caught in a storm, but we shouldn't fear the unknown or be afraid to trust God with things over which we have no control." I am NOT in control of those things so there is no sense in worrying about them! I should keep my family reasonably safe and leave the rest in God's hands.



A blog I read daily, written by a mother of triplets somewhere in Georgia (I don't know this lady but her blog is awesome!), has had several posts lately that really speak to how I've been feeling. In one post she says,

"As Moms charged with the safety and well-being of little lives, I think of the cost of an ill-placed mistake, distraction or lack of judgment on our part. Then I think about my belief in the Sovereignty of God and the advisement in Scripture that we will have trouble and heartache in this world. It is all too much for me to ponder for too long. So, I take a deep breath. I place my trust in my God, not myself. I pray for wisdom, discernment, patience and care."


God is reminding me that he is working everything out for my good (Romans 8:28), so I have to trust Him. The triplet mom quoted Andy Stanley on her blog a couple of days ago, and I like what he says about faith: "Faith is not about moving God to embrace our agendas. It is about being moved to embrace his agenda. As Jesus demonstrates for us, great faith is reflected in great surrender."

My prayer is that God will increase my faith in Him, so I will stop holding so tightly to the things of this world. I want to stop worrying about what I cannot control, and just serve God knowing He has a wonderful plan in motion!